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Disappointment awaits all adults who have the

'correct' answer in mind when they question children,

and it is their own fault for the question is not sincere.

They seek their own image in another person and

are hurt when they find that the other is truly other.

Albert Schweitzer

neuro-linguistic programming:

Liberating Parents

How do we give our children the best start in life?

Liberating Parents takes the unique Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP) approach to self-development and shows you how to apply it in your relationship with children.   Instead of telling children what to think, how to behave and who to be… with NLP we can influence children to develop discernment and exceptional cognitive skills to be able to create the life they want.

Limiting beliefs

Children learn primarily through modelling.   They emulate or copy the behaviours of the people around them without any understanding of the thinking that motivates the behaviour.   When we relate to children through limiting beliefs they can model our behaviour and so inadvertently take on limiting beliefs.   With limiting beliefs comes an impoverished life.

Improving the model

Liberating Parents is about improving our own lives.   It is a process for freeing ourselves from limiting ways of thinking and behaving.   Our children can then benefit in three ways;

1.   They can model our new behaviours.

2.   They can model the process by which we make personal changes when we discover unconscious beliefs/filters that have been limiting our personal freedom.

3.   The way that we relate to them is a model for how to respect each other’s personal freedom and ability to learn to learn.  

We can only give what we have

Liberating Parents is the approach to parenting that you have been looking for.   You want to relate to children in a congruent way, that is, the very freedom that you want is the same freedom that your children can have.  

To view the book at Lulu click here. 

Introduction


If human beings are able to learn…

If human beings can communicate with themselves and each other through verbal and non-verbal forms of communication…

If human beings, through their communication, can offer differences to themselves and others that can be used to enhance or improve aspects of experience…

Then Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is the most advanced form of communication for influencing ourselves and each other to learn how to make the most of our human potential.


As an NLP Consultant I have helped my clients develop greater confidence, learn skills for creating satisfying relationships and motivate themselves to make their dreams and goals a reality.

But this notion of personal development is intriguing. It is about learning to choose what you want your life to be like… and then making it happen. But what if you haven’t learned how to do this? What if you are aware of habits in your thinking and behaviour that make life less than enjoyable or perhaps even miserable?

When we were children we were influenced by many people. Obviously our parents or immediate carers were probably the most influential people in our lives. We modelled or emulated our parents and other people and learned many things. If the people we modelled thought they could learn and do anything then we learned to do that too. If we modelled people who were limited in their thinking then we learned how to limit what we thought we could do and what we could have.

When parents develop greater personal resourcefulness, learn what is most important to them and learn how to enjoy life even more, then they model for their children exceptional skills.

And this is what you can do with NLP. You can discover limiting ways of thinking that lie in your unconscious mind; limiting thoughts and beliefs that, although you may not be consciously aware of them, govern your behaviour. You can learn how to change limiting thoughts and create more choice. With greater personal freedom you can do… whatever you want. And when you can do that how will you relate to your children? Will you want to encourage them to limit themselves or will you want to encourage them to nurture their own personal freedom and their ability to learn and do whatever they want?

You can only give what you have. Think about that. What do you have?

We are going to start with a look at The Conversation with my Unconscious. This will give you some idea of how I have questioned many of the limiting ideas that govern peoples’ lives.

We will then have a closer look at how our use of language can give us an insight into the unconscious beliefs and ideas that shape our thinking and behaviour and how they affect the ways in which we relate to others, especially children.

Then we will have a look at how we can use NLP formats or exercises to become aware of limiting or problematic habits and replace them with greater behavioural flexibility and emotional intelligence.

And then we will end with a suggestion, and the suggestion is this; that the essence of parenting, the art of parenting if you will, is relating to children in such a way that your influence encourages them to learn how to think so that they can choose what to think for themselves. Then, and only then, can your children choose to live life as they want, and do what has up until now been a most rare phenomenon... think creatively and with wisdom to experience the sensory delights that life has to offer.


Keith Gilbert (Grad.Cert.NLP)
Sydney, Australia
2008

To view the book at Lulu click here. 

Do you want to learn how to relate to your children with NLP?  Then the first step is to discover what emotional intelligence is and how you can develop it.  You can click here to go to the Developing Emotional Intelligence page.

To return to the home page click here.